My Battles in Fallujah to the Battle for My Soul: The Good, the Bad and the Ultimate Victory of an American Hero

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Speaker 1: This is Lee Habib, and this is our American Stories, the show where America is the star and the American people. Search for the All American Stories podcasts. Go to the iHeartRadio app, to Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Our next story comes to us from a veteran of the US Army. He served with the eighty second Airborne Division in both Iraq and Afghanistan. Here’s Fernando Arroyo.

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Speaker 2: I remember it was nineteen ninety one and I was five or six years old. I was sitting in my kindergarten class when the school principal walked in and Miss Sponse, my Bandini Elementary School kindergarten teacher. She said, okay, kids, stop playing, sit in front of the class. And then the principal stood up in front of us and he said, and you know, you can be whatever you want when you grow up. And all the kids are like, wow, that’s cool. And I’ve always been quiet. I kind of just looked at the kids, like why are you so amazed at this? But whatever, and then the class got quiet and I look up and everyone’s looking at me, and the school principle is looking at me, and I thought I was in trouble, and then he looks at me and he kind of he put his hands on his lap and he bent down and he says, what’s your name. I said, my name’s Fernando. He said, what do you want to be when you grow up? I said, I want to be a police officer, a soldier, and a pastor. And he’s like, he made a face like, well, that’s weird, and he said, why do you want to be a soldier and a police officer? I said, because I want to shoot guns and fight bad guys. He’s like, okay, why do you want to be a pastor? I said, because I believe in Jesus Christ. So, at a young age of five years old, I remember watching Desert Storm on TV. And the coolest thing for me wasn’t the stealth bombers or all the cool missiles and all the images of explosions. It was the guys on the ground. Those were the real heroes. Those were the guys that I thought, man, like, I’m watching Gi Joe cartoons and stuff, but like, they’re the real deal. They’re charging towards the gunfire, They’re putting their life on the line. Well, as time went on, ten years later, I’m a senior at Bell Gardens High School. It’s September eleven, two thousand and one. I was late for class and I remember walking into my first period Spanish class, which you know, Spanish was my first language. I just wanted an easy. I didn’t even get an A. I got like a B. That was terrible. But then when that class was over, the bell rang, and now I had to go to my government class, second period Government. And when I walked in, all the students, you know, the bell had rang. This should have been the class should have been empty for the next class. They were all still there, and the teacher had his TV out and everyone’s glued to the television. I looked at the screen and I could see smoke coming out of one of the towers. And then I saw another airplane hit the second tower and this big ball of fire, and one girl shouted, who would do this? And some kids were crying, and then I heard on the news America is under attack. Then I watched live on TV as people were jumping out of windows to their death because they would rather commit suicide than burn alive. And I felt this deep pain inside me where something has to be done. And it’s going to be me. So on September twenty ninth, two thousand and one, I was enlisted in the army. I remember going to the recruiter and he said, what do you want to do in my army? And I said, I want to be a paratrooper. He said, do you know what that is? I’m like, yeah, you know, you jump out of planes and shoot guns. And he says, dude, it’s not nice. You’re gonna be jumping at night in full combat gear. You’re gonna be the first ones in combat. You’re gonna get shot at. You’re gonna be out in the rain and the snow and the mud. It’s gonna be dirty. Like you don’t want to do that. I said, no, that’s what I want to do. He said, look, we have this contract right now because the army needs cooks, so we can pay you twenty thousand dollars to be a cook in the army sign up bonus of twenty thousand. I said, no, I don’t want to be a cook. I want to be an airborne paratrooper. And he’s like, all right, but don’t come back to me later and say that I didn’t try to warn you or talk you out of it, or that I lied to you. And then at one point he says, look, have you ever been on an airplane? And I grew up poor, I never traveled. I said, no, I’ve never been on an airplane. He’s like, and you’re gonna volunteer to parachute out of a perfectly good aircraft into battle. I’m like, yeah, that sounds cool, all right. He pulled out the piece of paper. He says, this is the contract Airborne Infantry Fort Bragg, North Carolina. I graduated in June of two thousand and two, and then in August twenty first, two thousand and two, I was on an airplane for the first time in my life, on an airplane on my way to Fort Benning, Georgia. And I remember when that aeroplane took off, man Like, I had never experienced that before. First time flying. I’m eighteen years old, and there’s you know, the plane’s shaking, and I’m like, whoa, whoa, what’s going on? Man Like? Is this normal? And then once we were in the sky, I looked out the window. I thought, oh, I’m an idiot. The recruiter was right. I should have never volunteered for this. This is dumb, Heed. He was being honest. He actually tried to save me. And I remember on that airplane next to me, this guy could tell that I was nervous, and he says, what’s wrong. I said, I’ve never been on an aeroplane before, and I’m on my way to train a parachute out of aeroplanes in the Army. And he asked me, are you a Christian? I said, yeah, I’m a Christian. He says, did you pray about this? I said yeah. Do you believe that this is God’s calling for you? I said yes. He’s like, then you’re gonna be fine, and I felt peace. But all that piece ended when, you know, after checking in and getting my uniforms and equipment, it was time to meet the drill sergeants. And these three drill sergeants their mission was to train me to shoot, move, communicate, and kill. We trained as a team. It was brutal physical training. I remember being a skinny kid, you know, never having left the state of California, and now I’m surrounded by people from every state, from all walks of life, and we’re in this together. And that created a brotherhood. It created a bond we had to rely on each other, to watch each other’s backs. We went through the suffering together, and suffering builds brotherhood, It builds a team. You have to suffer together. That’s exactly what infantry school does. You suffer together, train together, and then you’re taught you’re only as strong as your weakest link. So all those things were instilled in me.

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Speaker 1: And you’ve been listening to Fernando Arroyo story. He discovers nine to eleven in his government class, is a high school senior and immediately knows what he wants to do, jump out of airplanes. When we come back. More of Fernando Arroyo story here on our American Stories.

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Speaker 2: Here are in our American Stories.

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Speaker 1: We bring you inspiring stories of history, sports, business, faith, and love. Stories from a great and beautiful country that need to be told. But we can’t do it without you. Our stories are free to listen to, but they’re not free to make. If you love our stories in America like we do, please go to our American Stories dot com and click the donate button. Give a little, give a lot, help us keep the great American stories coming. That’s our American Stories dot Com. And we continue with our American stories and Fernando Arroyo story his book The Shadow of Death from My Battles in Fallujah, that the Battle for my Soul is available wherever you get your books. Let’s pick up when we last left off.

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Speaker 2: I graduated from infantry school and then it was time for me to go to airborne school. And it’s just down the road. Somehow, we made it to the hangar on the airstrip and the airplanes are waiting for us, and we put on our gear. We get inspected, and once everyone’s inspected, all right, stand up, and we loaded up on this C one thirty aircraft and we’re packed in there like sardines. And then when the doors closed, the thought came, I am not going to be in this airplane when it lands. And then the command ten minutes and then command by command to stand up, hook up, check equipment, sound off for equipment. Check. The door’s open, the side doors on both sides of the sea one thirty. The air just hits us. The plane is shaky. I look out the door. I can see tiny little houses and trees. I’m like, oh no, this is oh this is gonna be terrible. Then I hear stand by like oh no, okay, the first jumper’s ready. I’m like jumper number ten, and I’m just I don’t even want to look at this guy that’s about to jump. I’m looking at the boots of the guy in front of me as the wind is making his pants move side to side, you know, violently. And then I hear green light go, and then one by one, everyone’s jumping out of the airplane. And I’m walking forward with my static line, just following the boots of the guy in front of me. And then I watch him just disappear into this door, like out into the sky, get sucked out of this airplane. And I’m next. I just hand off my static line, I make a right face turn, and I just run out this store. Just thrust myself out of this plane. I feel the one hundred and thirty nine winds just smack me, and I’m flying in this and I could see the airplane passing me as I’m jumping out, and I count one thousand, two thousand, three thousand, four thousand, and then I feel a tug and it’s my parachute opening. Oh thank god, man, it was. I felt a sense of relief, you know, like that was the fear of wondering whether my parachute was going to open or not. That was the scary part. But I did that five times, and that included nighttime jumps, and I made it into the Airborne. Then after a short ceremony of getting my airborne wings pinned on my chest, I loaded on a bus with my gear and I went to Fort Bragg, North Carolina. And Fort Bragg, North Carolina is the home of the Airborne and Special Operations Forces. You have the eighty second Airborne, you have the Army Green Berets, and you have the Army’s Special Missions Unit, a counter terrorism unit. They’re very elite, be mostly the unit in the world. I was with the eighty second Airborne and I remember arriving at my battalion and I’m the new guy. I had to prove myself. I just had to be on my best and weird enough. I actually I was offered a position, for a very privileged position, for a platoon to be in a reconnaissance team that night, the scalp platoon. It’s the battalion Reconnaissance platoon. And all these guys go to ranger school. They’re snipers. They have the best training and you know they’re the strongest and fastest. That’s you know, they’re the best. We were trained to be ghost. We wore gilly suits, we dressed like trees. We were invisible. That was our job to go ahead of the twelve hundred man battalion and teams as small as two two to six man teams and be unseen, undetected, and gather intelligence about the enemy to give to the battalion commander so that he could plan his attacks. That’s what I was strained to do. A few months later, it was time for my first combat deployment, and my first deployment was to Fallujah, Iraq after the invasion of Iraq. It was August of two thousand and three, and we landed in the Baghdad International Airport. We did submissions in the Baghdad International Airport, hunting some of Saddam Hussein’s captains and Bath Party Saddam loyalists. But then we were giving orders that we were going to go into the city that would later become known as the most dangerous city in the world, Fallujah. I remember my first combat mission. It was in Fallujah. It was at nighttime and our mission was called a movement to contact mission, which basically means search and destroy. And I’m sitting in the back of a cargo humvey and I’m looking towards the city at nighttime with night vision, and I could see these glowing green and red trace arounds coming up from the city. The insurgents were in the city, shooting their Ak forty sevens and machine guns in the air, and they were challenging us to a fight. We had a military intelligence team intercepting their radios and cell phones, and they were saying that when the Americans come in the city tonight, we’re going to kill them, and you know, bring it on their cowards and all this stuff. And I remember Captain Kirkpatrick. He said, tell them hold on, We’re going to be right there. And the chaplain said a prayer, Chaplain Knight. He said, all right, man, gather around now, Chaplain Knight, former Army Delta of the Special Missions unit that I said, you know, the mostly the unit in the world, and he felt the calling to be a chaplain, so he left the unit to be a chaplain and he was our chaplain. A Texas guy, big bald, white guy, just muscular. He was just everybody feared him and he says, let’s pray man, and he says, Lord, protect us against these savages as we go into combat, and guide our bullets that they may hit them and take them to the depths of Hell in your name, Amen, Like okay. So then we get on this s dirt road. All of a sudden, all the bullet stopped flying. We knew, okay, we’re being watched. They know we’re coming. So we go into the city and we’re driving up and down the streets looking for a fight, and there’s no one. It’s like these guys like cockroaches. When the lights turn on, they just disappeared. And we’re driving up and down the city. I have my night vision on. I could see every you know, my infrared laser and everybody’s infrared lasers were aiming at windows and watching rooftops and like, where are these guys? And then I caught a glimpse of a guy in an alley with a cell phone, hiding behind a dumpster in the alley and he’s on his cell phone. And then that’s when I heard over the radio, we’re being washed. It’s coming. And then I heard two explosions boom boom, and I felt the blast wave in my chest and I saw two RPGs glowing red. They flew over my head, like five feet over my head. These rockets were meant for me and my friends. And then it was just an eruption of gunfire. And you see these green and red trace around, these bullets whizzing past me, and I could hear the sonic boom of the explosions as the bullets are flying by me, and it was like an out of body experience. I just did what I was trained to do. The training kicked in. I’m shooting at a muzzle flash from ak’s, I’m shooting at windows. We’re taking fire from a two story house. I mean, there’s machine guns going off, and we’re driving out of there, trying to get out of what’s called the kill zone. And then I hear maguire yell and he says, there’s the guy running. As he’s reloading his anade launcher, he says, there’s a guy running. And I see this guy running, and I aimed right for his chest. I put my infrared laser on his chest, tracking him, and I must have shot him five times, and I watched my bullets enter and exit his body and he fell into the swamp and disappeared, and then I heard click, I’m changing mags, I reload, I come back up to shoot Ceasepire, Ceasepire. It was over. This was so fast. There was something bothering me, and I was thinking, like what bothered me? And I remember shooting that guy and I thought, well, you know, I mean, if he hadn’t shot at me, I wouldn’t have shot him. So it wasn’t bothering me that, you know, I killed a guy, I killed a human being. What scared me, rather, I think it was it scared me was how easy it was for me to do it. It kind of made me wonder who I am. You know, I just kind of like the thoughts of of who I am? What kind of person am I? You know, I’m nineteen years old, fresh out of this small city, grew up in bell Garden, sleeping on the living room floor. This is my first time leaving the country. I’m learning who I am and I’m learning things about myself I didn’t know.

00:17:14
Speaker 1: And you’re listening to Fernando Arroyo tell his story, and what a story it is. From high school watching nine to eleven and the towers fall to joining while Joining the eighty second Airborne and within months finds himself in Fallujah, indeed one of the most dangerous places in the world, and in battle, and he has his first kill, and now he’s got to live with himself, and he’s wondering what kind of a man he is and what kind of a man he’ll become as more of this comes his way. When we come back more of Fernando Arroyo’s story here on our American Stories. And we returned to our American Stories, we last learned about US Army paratrooper Fernando Arroyo, the nineteen year old Bell Gardens, California native, having to shoot an Iraqi insurgent well out on his first mission. Let’s return to Fernando.

00:18:25
Speaker 2: That deployment, I would get in several more gunfights, and I would experience several IEDs and near death encounters and see the horrors of war. I made it through that deployment. I came back from Fallujah and I got home for the two week vacation and I’m sitting in my living room watching TV. And it was garbage day and behind my house was an alley and there’s a dumpster in the alley and I’m sitting with my mom and my brother. I don’t think my dad was there. You know, we’re just enjoying family time together watching TV. So the garbage truck picks a dumpster up and then it shakes it once it gets up top right to get all the trash out. Well, when it shook, it was like an explosion, right, boom, boom boom. I yelled in coming, get down, and I dove to my living room floor and I said, get down, get down, and my family’s looking at me, and I started laughing. I said, oh, my bad. Yeah, I’m back, no problems, hahaha. It’s funny. And I got up, sat down, and my mom’s crying. She’s like, miho, are you okay. I said, yeah, Mom, I’m okay, I’m okay. Two weeks past, I’m back in North Carolina and I’m doing training. And it was between Iraq and Afghanistan for me during those that time that I went to Army Ranger School. So first before you go to that hell, you gotta to pre Hell, which is pre Ranger. Out of the fifty guys that went, fifteen of us made it. Then I went to ranger school. The big leagues and I made it past the first phase. I passed the land navigation part. I made it past the Darby phase the first phase. Then I went to the Mountain phase of Ranger School and Delanaga Georgia, and I failed Delanaga Georgia, so I was a recycle. So I had to wait a week for the next class. And during that week, we eat three meals a day. But we’re so hungry because we’ve been eating only one meal a day for so long that three meals a day is not enough. So at night we would sneak out and go dumpster diving, and we’d eat out of dumpsters and man, like, you can find some good stuff in those dumpsters, especially the one behind the chowel haul. It’s like, wow, they’re throwing out perfectly good cake. So I finally I breathed the mountain phase. Then I went to Florida for the Jungle phase. I passed, and yeah, all right, I earned my Ranger tap. I felt so good, and then I got hit with a letter saying that I’ve been stop loss. The Army said, anyone getting out after June of six is not getting out of the army. You are hereby stop loss. Stop loss. The army cannot afford to lose you. We need enough soldiers to be combat effective, So you’re going to Iraq for a year. I told this to my girlfriend, who thought, you know, I was going to get out and we were going to be together, and she was upset just as I was. But then she said, you know what, I can’t wait for you. I can’t do this, and she broke my heart. So by this point I started off my relation my army service, praying to God, going to church, and I hadn’t done that in a while. Like I just God wasn’t on the top of my list of things of people I wanted to talk to or have a relationship with. And I remember I had no one else to be angry at but God. I just blamed God, like this is your fault. If God is in control of all things, then you’re the one that’s keeping me in the army. You’re the reason my girlfriend just dumped me. You know, I was just mad, and I remember going to war and thinking I’m gonna die. So that one year deployment was to Beiji Iraq, and it turned into a fifteen month deployment and I lost a lot of friends. I remember my buddies, Miller and Garrard. One night they went out on a counter ied mission. We were living at an oil refinery for days at a time and carrying out missions from the Beiji Oil Refinery. Missions to conduct counter ied missions, kill or capture missions where we would go into people’s houses at night, you know these bad guys. We use cell phones and other intelligence means of finding bad guys and snatching them out of their beds at night, which was really fun. And yeah, going into a house at night and they’re like, there you are the guy. We have a picture of him, this is his name. He’s making bombs And there he is, sound asleep, and I just zip tie him slowly, turn him around on his stomach, zip tie his hands behind his back, and then I would shake him wake up and they’d wake up and oh, no, America is here, like hey, we got you, you know. So that was fun. War is fun until somebody gets hurt. And that night Miller and Gerard were blown up. Before we went out on missions, we always said, I love you, stay safe because you just never knew what was gonna happen. And I had told them that that night before they went out and I said, I love you, stay safe, And now they were being loaded on a helicopter and I didn’t know if they were going to live because they lost so much blood. Miller did end up flatlining, but the medics brought him back. Garard he was fine, so they both survived. But I didn’t know that right, Like I didn’t know. They got on the helicopter and left, and that was it, and I was filled with rage and anger, and again I blamed God that deployment. I lost several friends. We even had a chechen and sniper hunting us, and he was getting headshots. We were hunting bad guys that they were hunting us. Fifteen months in combat, I come back about a month and a half later. I’m a college student at Crito’s Community College. My body was here, my mind was in Iraq. I couldn’t go anywhere without a gun. Going shopping at the mall was hell. I would plan my visits. What do I need? I need pants and shirts? Cool. I’m gonna like I had a map of the mall. This is where the store is. I’m gonna come in this way. Park here, I’m gonna go in this door, make a right. I’m gonna pick two pairs of pants, two shorts, and I gotta get out of there. I remember being in like the dressing, you know, trying on clothes and sweating because I’m just like I’m taking too long, like if the enemy’s gonna find me here, and like, you know, I need to hurry up and get out of there. That’s like my I don’t know, it was weird, you know. About three years after I got out, it got at its all time worse. I finished my bachelor’s degree at UC Irvine in criminology, hoping that I would be in law enforcement. No law enforcement agency hired me. I applied for several government jobs, all of them rejected me. The only job I would get was working at a wholesale a warehouse. I don’t know why she said their name, but I’m a shopping cart collector. That’s what I was doing. I had combat experience, leadership skills, Army ranger school under my bell, a bachelor’s degree from one of the top universities in the country, and I’m collecting shopping carts in the army. I had a mission. I had a brother. I lost that I was going to church, but I was like sitting in the back of church with a hangover. I had no purpose. I felt like I failled it life. I thought, you know what, I’m twenty six years old at the time, twenty six, twenty seven. I lived a good life. Twenty two veterans commit suicide every day, and that’s the statistic. I was about to become one of them.

00:26:29
Speaker 1: And you’re listening to Fernando Arroyo share his darkest days with you, with all of us. He comes back from Iraq. He’s in junior college and even a trip to a mall, well, he can’t do it like the rest of us can. He’s left Iraq, but Iraq it hasn’t left him. He finishes at Calvine, I can’t get that job as a cup, ends up collecting shopping carts. He’s lost his mission. He’s a man without a purpose, and twenty two vets commit suicide every day, and he’s thinking, well, he just might be the next. When we come back, more of the story of Fernando Arroyo’s service and his life after service here on our American Stories, and we continue with our American stories and with Fernando Arroyo’s story. After years of combat experience in the US Army, graduating from both Rangers School and the University of California, Irvine with a criminology degree. Fernando Arroyo failed to get a job of the police agency or with the federal government. Instead, he was collecting shopping carts at a local grocery store. Let’s return to Fernando’s story.

00:28:05
Speaker 2: One day, I just had a miserable day. You know, I’m collecting shopping carts in the sun, Like what am I doing. I remember going home and just going to my studio apartment and I was just drinking and drinking. Close the blinds. I’m in the dark. I passed out and I had another nightmare. By this point, I was so afraid. I didn’t want to sleep because the nightmares were so real. I wake up and like just soaked in sweat with a gun in my hand. I went to the fridge. I grabbed a beer and then I closed my eyes as tears are rolling down my cheeks. My hands are shaking, and I hear the click. I took the safety off, and I remember my mind with a pistol in my mouth. I said, God, if you’re there, save me. There was no response, and when I put my thumb on the trigger and I slowly started to squeeze. I heard a boom and I opened my eyes and I dropped the gun and I checked my head. There’s no hole. There’s no blood. I looked around, there’s no blood. In my studio. I had a desk to the right of my couch and on that desk was my Bible. That bible just flew off and hit the floor, and that’s the explosion. I heard the bang that I heard, and I remember I just fell on my knees and I said, I need help. I need help. I pray to God. I said, I need help. I’m tired of living like this. And then the next day, my buddy Louis I knew him from high school. He also served in the army and now he’s working for the VA and his job was to get veterans connected to help. And he kept calling me like months ago, like every yeah. He was just he was starting to piss me off. He was bothering me, like why you keep calling me. He’s like, dude, you need to go to the VA. You need to talk to a psychologist. I said, no, I don’t, no, I don’t. He’s like, look, man, I know what you did. You’re not right, like, I know you’re not. I’m fine, I’m fine. You know, I didn’t share this with anyone. I didn’t tell anyone was having nightmares. I didn’t, you know, not even at church. I didn’t tell anyone about this. So finally he’s like, he calls me. He says, come on, I want to I’ll pick you up. I’ll buy you breakfast. I said, you know what you had me at breakfast. So so next thing I know, I’m at a mental health clinic in East LA and they give me a packet to fill out. I’m going to talk to a clinical social worker named Bob. So I felt, you know this this sheet, this questionnaire. It’s like, have you been to combat, have you shot anyone? Did any of your friends die? You know, all these questions and I lied no, no, no, no, no. Are you having nightmares? Nope? Do you drink alcohol? Yeah? About how many drinks do you have just a couple on the weekend. So I submit this packet and then out comes Bob with the packet and he’s like, Fernando, Hi, I’m Bob, Like, come on, let’s go to my office, Like okay, and he says, well, look, according to your answers. You don’t need us, You’re good, I said, great, Can I leave? He’s like, no, no, no, this is the thing I don’t understand, Fernando. And he pulls out my military records and he says, you went to Iraq twice, Afghanistan once you were a paratrooper, airborne infantry. You graduated Army Army Ranger School, you earned the Combat Infantryman’s Badge, which means you are engaged in combat with the enemy. Your military history does not match your answers. Bottom line. I think you’re full of it, he said, Fernando. I’m here to help you. I’m here to help you, he said, I remember, he said, even if you’ve committed murder, what you say stays between us. I’m here to help you. And he’s looking at me, and it’s just this awkward silence. He can tell that. The hamster was running in my brain, like what do I do? Do I leave or do I stay? And I looked at him and I said, what do you want to know? And then he said how many times did you go to war? I said three times? Did you ever shoot anyone? Yes? Were you ever shot at yes? Or any of your friends killed? Yes, are you having nightmares? Yes? About how many hours of sleep do you get each other? Two to three? Do you drink alcohol? Yes? How many drinks did you have Friday night? About thirty six? Who were you with alone? How many drinks did you have Saturday? The same? Who were you with alone? He said, you need help? And I broke down. For the next year, I met with Bob every week and I would just share everything I was struggling with, and he gave me perspective. I was holding myself to the American standard I call it where what I did in war was horrible, and what I saw was horrible, but it was a necessary evil. What I believe we did as American troops in Iraq and Afghanistan is keep terrorists out of our country. We fought them out of here so that everyone here would be safe. We kept America free of another ninety eleven for over twenty some years. That’s what we’ve done. But when I came here, I was applying the moral standards of this country and living here to what I did in war. And I thought that if I shared what I did in combat, people would think that I am an animal. People would reject me. My church would reject me, so I didn’t share with anyone. But it turned out that was a lie. It was a lie. And as I started to share with Bob, then I started to share with others and I found how accepted I was and how I’m not the only one who’s suffering. So I thought, Okay, this law enforcement thing didn’t work. God, you know what I’m going through, you know how I’m suffering. Heal me, Lord, help me to heal. And he did. He got me, you know, into a nice church community. And well, at my church, the pastor he kept getting sick and I had to cover for him. It was a small church, like fifty people, and everyone just you know, they looked at me to cover to start preaching. I’m like, I’m going to preach, like what? So I would preach and uh, I mean it was more complicated than that. But I thought, you know what, maybe I should go to seminary. The trauma I went through and the care that I received, now I wanted to turn around and offer that care to others. So I went to seminary at Biola University for to earn my Master in Divinity in Pastoral Care and Counseling, and I found a veteran community there and we would talk and you know, just we bonded as vets and shared our struggles. And I found myself with veterans helping veterans, and I felt like that was my calling. When I graduated from seminary, my buddy was working at the Orange County Rescue Mission and he said, hey, we need a veterans case manager, which is a pastoral counselor for veterans coming out of homelessness. So I was doing that for a few years, and then recently I started working at Step Forward Academy, where I work with veterans at the Step Forward Academy and I say, look, you’re a veteran. You have a job, but let’s get you a career. Maybe the job you have you’re working in and you’re you know, it’s a nine to five. It pays the bills, But you can be doing something that pays you even more and is more in line with your skills and abilities. And that’s awesome. To be able to help veterans better their lives, to find their calling and their career, and to provide for their families. That’s what I do now. I’m also involved at Mariner’s Church in the city of Tustin, and I’ve met veterans there and I lead to men’s groups. I’m really big on community. I’m really big on mentorship and coaching, and that’s what I do now. I got out of the army. I kind of had an idea of what I wanted to do, but of course God had a plan, and his plan superseded mine. And he brought me to my lowest point, the lowest point in my life, and he saved me so that now he can use me to save others. And that’s what I do.

00:37:19
Speaker 1: And a great job on the storytelling and production by Craig Engler, and a special thanks to Fernando Arroyo whose book The Shadow of Death from My Battles in Fallujah to the Battle for My Soul. It’s available wherever you get your books.

00:37:34
Speaker 2: And what a scene.

00:37:34
Speaker 1: He set in that room, afraid to sleep, and the nightmares were so real. A large loud sound that he thought was the gun going off, but it was a Bible dropping on the floor. Incomes an angel, and that’s a buddy of his who kept telling him he needed help. And then another angel, that man in the intake center who told Fernando he was full of it. In the end, this began a new life. As Fernando put it, God saved me so I could save others. The story of Fernando Arroyo here on our American Stories